Of Courts and Crucifix

It's over with, folks. We finally have the last pieces of evidence - a dishwasher, the movie Private Ryan, and speeches by Douglas MacArthur. And, the predicate has been laid for us in a very revealing interview given by the justice himself. It turns out that Clarence Thomas did it with a flag and a crucifix in the den.

The Silent One has spoken.

As Brother Harlan has noted elsewhere, Justice Thomas has talked more to CBS 60 Minutes than from the bench. But, he has explained himself now. And, the only verdict that any reasonable jury can come to is . . . the guy is just depressed. I mean, more depressed than even I thought he was!! I would venture to say more depressed than ANYONE thought he was. He makes Thurgood Marshall look like a happy justice!! (Marshall, of course, was notoriously unhappy on the Court)

Justice Thomas' most recent comments have revealed the true source of his discontent. It is the 14th Amendment. If only Akhil Amar or Garrett Epps had a degree in psychology. Justice Thomas' long, rambling response to a question about "what since the Civil War has changed our view of the Constitution" reveals an inner tension brought about by an irreconcilable collection of values. There is a disconnect among Thomas' concern over too much emphasis on rights, the changing social and cultural norms that got him to the Court, and the intent of the framer of that amendment regarding to what use Congress could put it. I think it is causing him serious mental strain.

And, I gotta say what is it with Republicans and technology? George H.W. Bush was astounded by a grocery store scanner. Now we discover the justice he put on the Court finds dishwashers magical?!! Enjoys loading them and then peering inside during the dry cycle?!!

And, that swipe at those of us who think we can do his job better than he can - “What I have found in this job is they know more about it than I do, especially if they have the title ‘law professor.’ ”

Ouch.

I think I'll stop picking on Justice Thomas now. And forever. I see him as a truly . . . clinically depressed character among the men and women who have occupied a seat on that court. There is nothing wrong with his jurisprudence that a little Zoloft couldn't cure. I hope he discovers that for himself.